Feeding time at the zoo… « angels & urchins blog

Feeding time at the zoo…
Thursday, July 22nd, 2010

If only I’d read the hand-chalked sign, “Quiet, well-behaved children always welcome” before sitting down. The restaurant was in Fowey, a pretty Cornish fishing village packed with places to eat. Some smart looking with linen tablecloths, others little more than ice cream parlours with a table or two on the street outside. We chose somewhere that looked as though it would provide a decent meal, in that all-important laidback family way. Which, to be fair, it did. But it took its time. And after an hour of hanging around, the children were lying on the floor, throwing napkins at each other and blowing lemonade through straws. Anyone walking into the restaurant by the end of the meal would either have walked straight out again, or rolled their eyes at the spoilt brats who didn’t know how to behave. But it wasn’t completely our fault.

I’m not blaming the restaurant because, if you’ll forgive the pun, we tend to make a meal out of it every time we go to a restaurant as a family. But we try, really we do, to make the children behave sensibly. We rarely eat out (what’s the point when the oldest of three is only five years old?) but occasionally needs must, like yesterday when we got caught in the rain at lunchtime and hadn’t yet bought a picnic.

So I’m suggesting a family restaurant charter. Parents will try to prevent children spoiling the enjoyment of others. But restaurants, in return, we need your help.

PARENTS’ PLEDGE To get the children to sit down in one place for as long as possible.
RESTAURANT REPLY Menu will be with you within seconds of you sitting down, and we’ll be back shortly after to take your order.

PARENTS’ PLEDGE To keep the children sitting down. ‘I spy’, ‘Scissor, stone, paper’, ‘Hide the stone under a napkin/in a glass’ all give at least five minutes respite.
RESTAURANT REPLY We’ll get the drinks out in minutes, buying parents a bit of time before the food arrives.

PARENTS’ PLEDGE To get as much food in the children’s mouths as they can. We’ll also order sensibly, so please don’t be offended if we think that two children’s meals can extend to three infants.
RESTAURANT REPLY To be sensible about portions. Parents won’t think you mean if you supply tiny portions for tiny children, as long as you charge accordingly.

PARENTS’ PLEDGE The last thing we want to do is be in a restaurant that isn’t geared up for children. So don’t pretend to like teenies if you don’t.
RESTAURANT REPLY Please don’t be offended if we direct you to a more suitable establishment.

PARENTS’ PLEDGE We’ll practice ‘restaurant eating’ at home, so that the children know what to expect.
RESTAURANT REPLY Staff will be trained in best kid practice – getting a high chair sorted, providing crayons and paper, and doing the order super-quick.

Any other ideas? I’d love to know when I’ll be able to take my tribe to a restaurant without leaving covered in food and blushes.

Tags: Food for thought, The Urchin Rants

8 Responses to “Feeding time at the zoo…”

liveotherwise says:

July 22, 2010 at 10:47

We try to make sure we eat as a family at home, and we have napkins and so on on the table. I well remember the time that my sister in a restaurant wanted to know what the funny little plate and piece of cloth were for, and my parents dying of embarassment But if you’ve 3 of 5 and under, you’ve your work cut out anyway, and it is just going to take time.
Pants With Names says:

July 22, 2010 at 10:54

I think the English are very un child friendly about having chidren in restaurants. The Bosnians would welcome our kids with open arms, do whatever they could to make the kids feel at home and often the waiters would take the boys off our hands and keep them amused.

But as we are in England, the charter above hits the spot. I promise to do all of the above if the restaurants do to!
trickykidzmum says:

July 22, 2010 at 11:05

Loved your post! We’ve all been there. Here’s how to “Prepare for Success” on your next restaurant visit http://tiny.cc/yddcp (I run http://www.trickykidz.co.uk, free expert advice for parents)
Tweets that mention Feeding time at the zoo… « angels & urchins blog -- Topsy.com says:

July 22, 2010 at 11:10

[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by KidStart and Gaby Becker, angels&urchinsblog. angels&urchinsblog said: Need help – how do YOU teach children to behave in restaurants? Mine are a nightmare. http://bit.ly/c0lgV5 [...]
angels&urchinsblog says:

July 22, 2010 at 20:02

liveotherwise – At least you didn’t start a napkin fight! But yes, think time is going to have to be our eventual saviour. And leaving them at home.

pantswithnameson – Bosnia sounds such a lovely country, in so many ways.

trickykidzmum – Lovely, thank you. I’ll come over and check the Prepare for Success post out.
maria says:

July 23, 2010 at 08:02

After experiencing life in Italy I am almost shocked at how unwelcome children are in many restaurants in the UK even for lunch! Dinner is a different matter altogether…
In Italy children are welcome in restaurants at any time, but the Italians much like the Spanish and other Europeans have a completely different attitude towards children. Many restaurants even have a child play area and I am not talking fast food here! I have always taken my son anywhere in any country, I even took him for early dinner to fancy restaurants in London armed of paper and crayons and unless they tell me no children allowed I will go, but I guess with one child you are less likely to start napkin fights!
Mrshev says:

July 23, 2010 at 12:12

Great post – as a general rule we try and avoid restaurants as it just ends in disaster.

The kids are too distracted and end up eating nothing at all and we eat nothing (or at best, shovel food down our necks so fast we nearly gag). Most places I have been in the UK are pretty good about kids, but I totally understand if you don’t want your lunch ruined by a bunch of kids running around.

Mine are 2 and 4 and the eldest will sit down and eat a lunch, but if we have to wait too long he’ll get bored. The 2 year old is uncontrollable, so we just avoid. Eating out is a pleasure, but ours are too young to enjoy it or realise it’s pleasure so we don’t bother wasting it on them.

Picnics: the way forward!
angels&urchinsblog says:

July 28, 2010 at 17:15

Maria – You’re right, we loved holidaying in Italy with the children for just that reason. One old lady even (if my very rusty Italian is correct) even said, ‘That’s not a child, he’s an angel’ about one of mine, not something even his grandparents might agree with. And yes, napkin/water/bread roll fights something I’m increasingly familiar with.

Mrshev – Paying for food that they don’t even eat is something that annoys me enormously. Picnics also have the advantage of usually being outdoors, so you don’t have to clear up all the under-the-table smears.

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